3am.

my body insists on staying up @ least until 3am...
jetlag is still kicking my booty...
BUT
it's okay.
because life is good.

so. this past week i....
celebrated my 20th.
made lanterns for my new room.
met my 2 "adopted" foreign exchange sisters.
saw THE HELP. (so good.)
taught my brother to drive stick shift.
bought The Cost of Discipleship (by Bonhoeffer) & Bruchko (by Olson). (book reviews coming soon, most likely.)
swam.
went for a run in the 96 degree weather.
ate chickfila almost every day.
missed my friends.
enjoyed hanging out with old friends.
played guitar.
made thank you notes.
went to church.
got some fro yo.
ETC.


it was a great first week back home.


god is faithful. he works in our lives even when we don't try very hard. 
there have been times in my life where God has told me to do something & i agreed & every step of the way, it was a huge battle, but i fought, fought, fought for what i knew i had to do. & it was worth it. it taught me a lot about considering Him worthy of all of my energy, efforts, time, money, etc. BUT, i'm learning that there are also times when following Jesus is almost TOO easy... like He just lays it right out there. all you have to do sometimes is say OK. OK, i'll follow. & he literally works it out right before your eyes.
god is so good.
he's good when we struggle. he's good when we don't.
he's good all the time. he loves us & is uniquely acquainted with us. 
that blows my mind!


this week i've seen more of the changes that have taken place in my heart in the past 5 months.
god has changed me.
i've talked to a lot of people this week that know me... or know who i was a year, 2 years ago. it's humbling, because i know that they know my junk. they've seen me in my dark times. they know who i was. & it's humbling... but for some reason, i just feel such a peace. because i am new. i'm really happy to be me. my hair has no dye in it... i hardly wear any makeup anymore. & clothes, they're cute, but i just don't love them like i used to. i don't feel the need to have the newest, cutest, trendiest wardrobe. 
simple. stripped. organic. raw. REAL. 
i feel REAL. i'm not hiding behind this hair dye or makeup or certain kind of clothes. 
now i'm just... me. i'm just Raegan. 
& i'm so happy with that. because i know i am deeply, deeply loved by God. :)
that's where my confidence stems from... from knowing i am LOVED. no matter what.
Love will change you from the inside out.
i love Love & i love Jesus.


just rambling now. 
sorry for my late night randomness.


goodnight, lovely people.
xo